The Setting Sun

The sun setting
over the Lake
is a technicolor blast
of a box of 64 crayons.

It is calming
like an Ativan
after a full-blown,
upscale panic attack.

You want to consume it
like a banana split
with extra whipped cream,
nuts, and a cherry.

But it’s quick
— fleeting
like a love affair
that’s over.

You’ll miss it
when it’s gone.

LLH
8-9-22
Written in Geneva-on-the-Lake, Ohio

Photo by Laurie Esposito Harley
Geneva-on-the-Lake
2020

Suburban America

I look out my window

and I see suburban America.

Two-story homes.

White and peach and sage.

Porches bathed in sunlight.

Mailboxes stuffed with letters

hung next to the front door.

The cars pass slowly

25 miles per hour.

People walk by

on the broken sidewalk

with baby strollers,

pet dogs on leashes,

or hand-in-hand with children.

Inside my comfortable home

I watch them go by

and wonder about their lives.

I sit here in my mansion

in the center of suburban America

and I wonder about the people

who live here, too.

LLH
6/24/2022
4:25 PM

Photo Credit: Daniel Frank at https://www.pexels.com/photo/dog-on-concrete-road-688835/

Moving On

I hasten my steps
proceeding towards
that which is new.

Momentum pushes me
as I continue onward,
toward the raw future.

Do you see me progress
as I launch myself
to face him unabated? 

Today I go forth
into tomorrow.
Shall I see you there?

LLH
01-05-22
7:00 PM
Write the Poem
Photo by Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/photos/cQ59b8chP5o

Writing

Writing has become a chore
that due to depression
has become ignored
like doing the dishes 
or sweeping the floor.

I force myself to write
or delegate the task
to hired writers
to keep myself
free.

Free from what?
Life used to be writing
and writing was life.
What is it now?

I force myself to write.
One word after another.
Word by word.
Step by step.
I’m walking back
to where I’ve never been.

I force myself to write
to learn to love my lover,
words on a page,
the process of expressing
who I am,
the process of returning to
where writing is freedom.

LLH
12/1/21
11:00 AM

Photo: @HannahOlinger https://unsplash.com/photos/8eSrC43qdro

Another Day at Work

^{Unsplash Image}

I want to dip into poetry.

Slowly, sweetly.

Instead I write 

of engagement rings and coffins.

Another day at work.

---

LLH
11-4-21
11:20 AM

Sometimes I Go Back

Photo by Alex Guillaume on Unsplash

Sometimes i reread my old poetry
because i want to go back
and feel all the feelings
of passion and affection.

Sometimes i want to go back
and remember the beach
with the salty waves
and two sets of footprints.

I want to go back
and see the RV
we drove cross-country in
and soaked in the jacuzzi.

Sometimes i need to go back
just so i can remember
what it was like
to be your friend.

LLH
10-25-21
4:00 PM

P.S. The divorce is final.

Falling

Photo by Oleg Magni from Pexels

I smelled a glimpse of pumpkin

and was transported to autumn.

I felt my sadness

fall away

and a glimmer of happiness

form within my chest.

This is the season

of crisp weather,

beautiful scenery,

and comfy sweaters.

I feel my self

slowly relaxing

at the passing of

busy summer

and the gentle entrance

of stunning fall.

LLH
8-15-21

Dreams

C Technical from Pexels

As children we dream
of doing extraordinary things
like writing books
and running a business
and being happily married.

And then we grow up
and reality hits us.

The book sits unread,
the business flounders,
and the marriage is in ruins.

What do we dream of now?
Now that diabetes
makes your feet numb,
and your divorce hearing
happens next month?

Do you dream
that you can be
a better mom
to your kids?

Do you dream
that your medicine
will help allay
your depression?

Do you just dream
that tomorrow will be
a day that is better
than you felt today?

LLH
07-26-2021

Do You Think It Was Love?

^{By Gabrielly from Pexels}

I still can’t say
your name aloud.
When I try,
as I near that word,
I tear up.
My voice cracks.
The tears form.

Who knew it’d be this hard?

Do you think it was love,
even though I denied it?
Even though I thought
I stayed on my side
of that imaginary line
we drew between us,
do you think it was love?

If so, I’m sorry.

I never meant
to cross it.
I never meant
to let myself fall.
I never meant
to do something
that you didn’t want.

*****

I’m sorry I fell in love with you.

LLH
4/1/21

I Can’t Let It Go

“In my defense, I have none
For never leaving well enough alone.
But it would’ve been fun
If you would’ve been the one….

“I persist and resist the temptation to ask you
If one thing had been different
Would everything be different today?”
~ The 1, Taylor Swift

I can’t let it go.
It’s been almost a year
since you said goodbye.
This time was for real.

And I can’t let it go.
I keep thinking of you.
I keep thinking of us.
But there never was an us, 
was there?

The things that have happened
that you don’t know about.
The things that have happened
that I don’t know about.

And I just can’t let it go.
I want to tell you
all about my life now.
I want to hear
all about yours.
But that’ll never happen again,
will it?

And I just can’t let you go.
I keep digging up the past
and dreaming of 
what-could’ve-been’s
but I wake up
and realize
you’ll never be
the one.

LLH
1-29-21
9:50 PM

I’m sorry, my friend, but it hurts.