Category Archives: Family

One Week After

The tears fall


over little hurts

real and imagined.


Our world hiccupped

to February ‘13

But now they are older

now they understand.



It is my fault.

I tried to make it work.



It isn’t under my control.

Is anything, really?


Control is an illusion.


I wipe the tears.

I offer my arms

and my love.


We eat pizza

and watch a movie

……and heal.


Tomorrow will be better.


Photo courtesy of Leonid Mamchenkov

Photo courtesy of Leonid Mamchenkov



















10:34 AM


Filed under Divorce, domestic abuse, Family, Feelings, Parenting

For Jason: Not Goodbye #30in30 #poetry

I know I haven't talked to you
Since I just don't know when,
I can't believe, as of today, 
We'll never talk again.

You made me laugh
And shared your smile
Although it was
For just a while.

Go on my brother,
And my friend...
This ain't goodbye;
It's not the end.

One day, some day
We will see you,
We'll see you smile,
Share a laugh or two.

Until that day
You've left us here
All alone 
With our tears.

For Jason


Filed under 30in30, Family, Feelings

Wish Flowers and Mom: About my New Blog Header

Wish Flower

Nature’s Wishes

for Mom

We were walking through the yard
Just Mom, sis, and me
Returning home from a visit
With a neighbor down the street.

I’m sure I saw the dandelion
About the same time as Mom.
It was plump and white with furry seeds
Just ready to take flight.

I didn’t think a thing about it
As my foot came crashing down
Right about the exact moment
That Mom began to speak.

“Look,” she said with such excitement
“It’s a dandelion!”
But my sneaker had crushed it down.
“Now you can’t wish upon it.”

I’ve grown since then; and Mom’s aged, too.
The cancer’s been rough on her.
But I’ve learned a lesson I’ll never forget
About childlike excitement and nature’s wishes.

Ev’ry time I see a dandelion
Its seeds all plump and white,
I close my eyes and make a wish
Sending each seed of hope in flight.

I don’t have the exact date that I wrote this poem at my fingertips, but it was sometime around 1998. I always wish for Mom each time I blow on a wish flower. And every time I see one, I make that wish for Mom.

Since this poem was written, my mother went on to heaven, where I’m sure she blows wish flowers for me.

And I realize that many people don’t click links in blogs, but I ask that you click this one, which will take you to the rest of the story of Wish Flowers and my mother. I promise it’s worth your time. It makes tears fall each time I read it, and caused my editor to cry as well. But it’s the truth.

I miss you, Mom.

P.S. Be sure to visit my new blog and let me know what you think of my header!

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Filed under Family, Feelings, Me, Memories, Mom, Nature

That’s my name; don’t wear it out.

I try to write a poem.

I try to think a thought.

But all i get out of my head

are interrupted spots.


My mind cannot complete


a single, solid thought.


My mind cannot compete.


It’s tired, overwrought.


Mom! is all i hear,

and Mom! is all they say,

and Mom! is reverberating

deep within my brain.


I put away my pen.

I set aside my poem.

‘Cause both will be there

another day

when all my kids are grown.


And no one will call “Mommy!”

And no one will need help.

There will be no more fights to handle

and no more yells or shouts.


The house it will be empty,

and sadly, i’ll be alone.

And in that peace and quiet

maybe then i’ll write a poem.





Filed under Family, Humor, Mom, Parenting

Not For Me

I have ev’ry reason

to be filled with all this rage.

It bubbles deep inside of me

and spills across this page.

It isn’t me

.                I worry for.

It isn’t me

.                you need to love.

The black sheep coat

you gave to me

.                I put it on;

.                I wear it out.

It fits me like a glove.

Yet these young eyes

that look at me –

searchingly, questioning –

I have no answers,

.                can’t you see?

It was us who left you.

We traveled down the coast.

We fought against the demons.

We ran from every ghost.

When we returned

to where you stood,

I suddenly realized

It was you

.                who had left.

I am dead

.                in your eyes.

Black Sheep Coat

The black sheep coat you gave to me... it fits me like a glove.


Filed under Family, Feelings

My Apple Tree

In my backyard
grows an apple tree.
It’s like God planted
it there for me.

Its curvy branches
are perfect for sittin’.
Its rotten apples,
the best for hittin’.

The apples it grows
can fill a whole cart.
They’re big ‘n juicy;
they’re green and tart.

I take a bite
and feed it to Shasta.
I eat slower
and she eats faster.

I help my Dad
each and ev’ry spring
to prune that tree
and prepare everything

so in cooler weather
my apple tree
will have more apples
for Shasta and me.

Me and Shasta

Me and Shasta

5/29 – 5/31/2010

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Filed under Children's Poetry, Family, Memories

Back In Time

Walking down the driveway

Feeling the rocks on my bare feet

Brings a timeless feeling

That I just can’t shake.

I can hear the splash of the pool

And the boys on their bikes

Riding through mud in the woods.

And the dinner bell calling me home.

But all of that is long gone

Replaced with grown-up tasks.

Kids to play with, teach, and feed.

A book to edit lies on my desk.

The laundry hasn’t been folded

In at least four loads.

But just for this moment in time

I am back to the days

Of wearing my swimsuit all day long

Of peeling potatoes

And setting the table

And seeing Mom at home.

By Laurie Esposito Harley

July 24, 2006

3:12 pm

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Filed under Family, Memories, Mom